For those of you who read this blog or have stumbled upon it by means of your layman “due diligence”, please read further. Due Diligence is not for the inexperienced and cannot come from the credence good community (See credence goods). Due Diligence must not be attempted, it must be undertaken. And if this does not happen correctly, you might as well end up with the undertaker! If you purchase due diligence from a credence good provider, you’re an idiot! That’s what I said, an I-D-I-O-T! If you buy it from a lawyer who is benefiting from the decision because he sells his services to people in the industry he’s investigating, then you’ve been had. If you do it yourself with the lack of knowledge, you’ve been had. If you hire a consultant that has something to gain or operates within the industry, you’re being hoodwinked. Even if you hire someone or take advice from someone who is not gaining from the relationship and they have not been in the industry, you’re going to lose.
“So Bloody, if I cannot do it myself and I cannot hire one who is in the industry, to whom do I turn?”
Great question, I say. Great question. So to whom do you go? Well, that in and of itself should make you so gunshy that you run in the other direction with great speed. But if you’re like 99.9% of the majority of blokes who still believes that franchising can provide you with “the freedom of owning your own business without having to do the groundbreaking”, you deserve to lose your life savings and more. Anyone who sets out to do due diligence and comes to the conclusion that franchising is any safer than opening up one’s own business, did a piss poor job of due diligence. The statistics are there for everyone to see. It’s called the Internet!
The golden rule to due diligence is: When you find something that smells, don’t eat it! It’s not good for you no matter how much sugar you put on it!
Due diligence of a franchise is as important as proving a business plan to a potential investor. When it comes to a franchise, you are the investor and if you eff up, you’re going to lose it all! So don’t be so stupid and don’t give the franchisor the benefit of the doubt. Be an effing Missouri mule and MAKE THEM PROVE EVERY BLOODY THING THEY SAY TO YOU! IF THEY CANNOT, THEY ARE LYING! IF THEY TELL YOU YOU WILL MAKE $50,000 A MONTH, MAKE THEM PUT IT IN WRITING! IF THEY REFUSE, TELL THEM THEY ARE LIARS AND LEAVE!
It only takes one subtle thing to go wrong and you will be completely broke and most likely without for the rest of your life. The banks don’t care, the lawyers don’t care, the government doesn’t care and damned if I know why I care. Maybe it’s because I’ve been there and don’t want you to have to go through what I had to in order to find out the ugly side of franchising.
Oh, one more thing; if you find any franchisor that will stand behind the asinine claims they make and put it in writing, send it to me or comment on it. I have yet to find a single one that will. Ever hear of a carnival? There’s a reason they come into town at night, set up their tents and leave in a week! Franchisors are the direct descendants of gypsies and carnival operators.
Bloody